Get To Know Your Neighbours

More of us than ever before are living alone. It’s time to Get To Know Our Neighbours. 

Do you know your next door neighbour? Is there someone in your street you could call on in an emergency?

If the answer is no, you’re not alone. According to YouGov polling almost three quarters (73%) of people in the UK don’t know their neighbours.

And, according to the ONS, more of us are living alone than ever before. It’s predicted in the next 20 years the number will rise to around 11 million people living alone. If we want to tackle loneliness across the UK, it’s vital we get to know the people that live near us – especially those who might be alone.

Knowing our neighbours is important

That’s not to say that everyone who lives alone is lonely of course. Many people who live alone have great friendships and social connections. But as we get older, it can become harder to leave the house and make those connections.

In polling we ran with YouGov we found that 72% think it’s important to know your neighbours. And we agree. For people of all ages, having someone to rely on nearby, who can look out for you, can make a huge difference.

It can be small things like someone watering the plants or keeping a spare key – or to much larger things – like when something goes wrong in our lives. Our neighbours and our community are often the first to lend a helping hand. But it’s more than that; we all need a sense of community and belonging. It’s part of what makes us human.

Boundaries are important 

It’s important to remember that we all have expectations and boundaries, and they should be respected.

For some of us the idea of an overbearing neighbour is mildly terrifying, and people will want and need different levels of interaction with their community.

But we worry that this fear gets in the way of all the wonderful things there are to be gained from knowing your neighbours. Both on a practical level and an emotional one. 

Similarly, for many people, introducing yourself to neighbours can be a bit nerve wracking. A lot of people who are lonely will stop reaching out to form new relationships for fear that they will be rejected. That’s why we should all go out of our way to be warm and welcoming when we can.

Research shows that loss of a sense of community can put people at a higher risk of experiencing loneliness, and that we are happier and healthier if we know people around us and feel a sense of belonging in our community.

Tips and ideas to get you started

A warm welcome

The easiest time to get to know your neighbours is when people first move in. Introduce yourself, leave them a gift, or a note to say welcome to the neighbourhood.

Start small

If you see a neighbour in your area, a simple smile, nod or even saying ‘hello’ is a good place to start. It will also help you see if or when your neighbour is open to having a chat. For many people this is about as connected as they’d like, and that’s completely fine. However, these small moments of connection are proven to make a difference to people who are lonely. And, well, it’s just a nice thing to do isn’t it?

Offer, or ask for, some help

Do you have a neighbour who might have trouble getting their gardening done or going shopping? Think how you might be able to ask if they wanted a hand.

Similarly, if you’re off on holiday you could ask if a neighbour could help water the plants or sign for a parcel. We all need a helping hand from time to time. Helping other people is good for them, and it’s also proven to improve your wellbeing.

Get to know the area

We all need a place to make friends and find people in our community who are interested in the same things as us. For some of us that’s the pub. For some of us that’s church. For some of us that’s walking the dog in the park, going to the local shops or a neighbourhood watch meeting.

Get involved in Big Lunch

The Big Lunch is the UK’s biggest annual get together for neighbours.  It’s a simple idea from the Eden Project: that as many people as possible across the UK have lunch with their neighbours annually on a weekend in June in a simple act of community, friendship and fun.

Sign up to Nextdoor

Nextdoor is a great app that helps you get to know and keep in touch with your neighbours. It’s free, private, and all users are verified before they can get involved on the app.

Find out more about The Cares Family in your local area

The Cares Family bring older and younger neighbours together to share time, friendship and new experiences through Social Clubs, a one-to-one Love Your Neighbour friendship programme, Outreach and Community Fundraising.

Share your tips with us

We’d love to know any tips or ideas you have for getting to know your neighbours. Be More Us is about, well, you.

Leave us a comment below on any stories, inspiration or advice on how to Get To Know Your Neighbours, our let us know on twitter using the hashtag #BeMoreUs.

Over the next month, we’re featuring four simple ways everyone in the UK can help tackle loneliness and help build a sense of belonging and community in the UK. Find out more.

 

(1). Lena Dahlberg & Kevin J. McKee (2014) Correlates of social and emotional loneliness in older people: evidence from an English community study, Aging & Mental Health,