How four feminists made meaningful friendships through their love of books

Polly Winn is one of the four founders of Cardiff Feminist Book Club. At 24, Polly moved back home after University and realised she was lonely. That’s when she met her co-founders, and the inspiration for Cardiff Feminist Book Club was born. Read on to find out how Polly is supporting Be More Us by making meaningful connections through the power of word.

There’s something so intimate about delving into a book, whiling away the hours lost in its pages and characters. Books can often be an escape or a form of respite from our own lives at times too. But despite being such a solitary pastime, reading can make us feel even more connected to those around us.

“Friendships formed over a shared love or experience of a book can feel like they’re made of stronger stuff.”

It’s no surprise really then that friendships formed over a shared love or experience of a book can feel like they’re made of stronger stuff; a mutual understanding and the kind of deeper connection that you can really crave when you feel alone. Irving Stone once wrote; “there are no faster or firmer friendships than those formed between people who love the same books.”

The four of us – Eli, Ali, Becky and Polly – had all met through work in various ways, and were all looking for a similar thing; to connect with a circle of like-minded women. For various reasons, we’d found ourselves in relatively new situations, away from our closest friends; having moved for work, to be closer to family, in with a partner etc. We were looking to rebuild those roots, and find people we could really be ourselves with.

We all work in the Women and Equalities sector, and feminism is something we feel very proudly passionate about. While most of us were lucky to already have lovely people in our lives, we were craving that shared passion and commitment to something that felt like such a significant part of who we are.

“Most people had come on their own, but the minute we started talking, we couldn’t stop.”

The first time we got together, we sat down around one of the girls’ dining tables and talked, non-stop for two hours. We laughed, we ranted, we planned, we got over-excited. We decided what we wanted to be about; bringing women together, showcasing women’s talents, talking about women’s shared experiences, and mostly, creating a space where women can be unapologetically themselves.

It was only really when we started promoting the book club that we realised we were onto something. We made our Instagram page on March 12th and within five days, we had a hundred followers. At our first ever meeting at the end of April, there was a buzzing atmosphere. We sat around the upstairs of a Cardiff coffee shop, keenly clutching our copies of Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie’s ‘We Should All Be Feminists’. Most people had come on their own.

“We were looking to rebuild those roots, and find people we could really be ourselves with.”

The minute we started talking, we couldn’t stop. We all had so much to say; about the book, about our lives, and quickly the conversation spiralled beyond to podcasts we love, how we felt about the latest political antics, our families and partners, and so much more. The women there were from different backgrounds and at different stages of their lives; on maternity leave, in a new city, with a new job; but we were all there for the same reason, to find women we could truly be ourselves with.

“We’ve made new meaningful friendships, and brought together a collective of intelligent, thoughtful and compassionate women and created a space where we can all truly be ourselves.”

Since then, things have just got bigger and better. People have left book clubs thanking us, saying “this is exactly what I’ve been looking for!”. We meet to chat about books every six weeks, but we’ve got a core group who have become really good friends. In between, we chat informally on WhatsApp about all sorts, we confide in each other, arrange trips to the theatre, or craft workshops or whatever else.

“Seeing a person reading your favourite book is like seeing a book recommend a person.”

We have many big plans and ideas for the future of the book club, but for now we’re so proud of what we’ve created. We’ve made new meaningful friendships, and brought together a collective of intelligent, thoughtful and compassionate women and created a space where we can all truly be ourselves.

One of our lovely members – and new friends – sent us a quote that said; “Seeing a person reading your favourite book is like seeing a book recommend a person”, and that really captures it.

Cardiff Feminist Book Club can be found on Instagram at @CardiffFeministBookClub, or you can get in touch at cardifffeministbookclub@gmail.com. Let us know if you want to set up your own branch!