‘Sometimes in life we don’t take the time to sit and chat.’
Independent Age, the older people’s charity, provides support to older people in a number of different ways. This includes regular phone calls or visits from one of their volunteers, which is a great way to help older people stay connected to their local community.
Elaine, 59, from Glasgow, has been volunteering with Independent Age for just over a year. This is how she met James, 89. Read on to find how they’re supporting Be More Us by making meaningful connections over lunch, dominos, and even carpet bowls!
“Sometimes in life we don’t take the time to sit and chat.”
When I first met James he had not long lost his wife. I have lost my husband too so we could empathise with each other. We had both lost loved ones recently and knew the effect it has. We could walk in each other’s shoes. We understood each other’s feelings.
The reason I volunteered for Independent Age was because I lost my dad. He had dementia and became isolated at the end of his life. This would have been someone he could have shared his memories with, as the family have heard them over the years.
“I enjoy the visits just as much as he does.”
I visit James every week and there has never been an awkward silence between us. We have much the same interests and many similar experiences at work. James is very cheery and very positive.
We talk so much that sometimes we don’t take time to stop and smell the roses; two hours goes by in a whizz. I enjoy the visits just as much as he does.
To begin with, I thought I was helping him but now I realise it’s for both of us. Sometimes in life we don’t take the time to sit and chat and laugh and talk about our weeks and that’s what I do with James.
James is a really interesting person to know. We talk about every subject. Sometimes your family knows about you and has heard all your stories so it’s enjoyable to share them with someone else.
“I have notice such a change in James… He’s so much happier. He used to stay at home. He’s now becoming involved in the community.”
I have noticed such a change in James. When he talks about his wife now he can enjoy the memories and the funny side. He’s so much happier. His confidence has increased. He used to stay at home. He’s now becoming involved in the community. He attends the local lunch club and plays dominos with the other men. This week he was invited to play carpet bowls and, as he has problems with standing, he did this sitting down and surprised everyone.
After the lunch club he tells me about everything that happens there and all the characters. After losing his wife he is beginning to enjoy life once more.
If you’ve been inspired by Elaine’s story, Independent Age are always looking for new volunteers who can help with the work they do to provide support to older people.